So Judy loaded up the Phil and the Caleb for a trip to her parents.  Of course, they got lost, doubled the length of their trip out there, and no sooner than they get there than the Phil decides to get a bug and throw up.  But course its all good.  And I am left alone with two teens.  Don’t get me wrong; I love my sons, I might even like them.  But we are three bachelors.  I won’t record all the stuff that does or does not happen when Judy is away, but my point is simple: it just is not purty.  Without the feminine around, things get dank and musty.  Words are less.  Meat and cheese abound.  Things just do not work the same.  And in the end, it is a loss.  There is an initial delight in the change, but very quickly, we miss wife/mom.  So hurry back.  By the time you get here, things will be clean, properly arranged, most of the laundry done, etc., but that will all come about in the hour prior to your arrival.  And we will be glad to see you home.

Folks, if you don’t know what OneNote is, you have to find out. And if you do, why did you hide it from me for so long? I just love being able to gather all my stuff into one place on the computer. I thought I blogged a lot! This is like some sort of mania. I have a work notebook, a personal one, and a writing one. All three are filling up fast. If anyone has any neat uses, pass it along. I will be riffing off this software idea for years to come.

To appease all the Facebook fiends, here is my attempt…

1. A somersault as a child has left a triad of dots on my back that for the last twenty plus years Mrs. Elliott has connected in a wierd game of tic-tac-toe.
2. I eat and write right-handed, but play throwing sports with my left, but use my right hand for racket sports, but golf left. 
3. I bowl with either hand, but not well with either.
4. I am the sixth member of U2
5. I once met Spike Lee and lived to tell about it.
6. A tornado once enjoyed hitting my house so much that when it got outside town, it turned around and came back.
7. I have yet to be defeated in a boxing match.
8. I have a fairly high sleep number on my bed
9. I can’t read less than 10 books at a time
10. My father-in-law believes I am of oriental derivation (seriously)
11. I had my first date with the girl now my wife, and asked her to marry me three years later on Groundhog’s Day. (‘84 and ‘87 respectively).
12. I have taught more people named Matt than any other name.
13. I would agree to work for nothing on Wendell Berry’s farm if he would agree to talk to me every day.
14. I have 14 blogs
15. I like Fresca
16. I belong to one of the smallest denominations in the world
17. I have read Webster’s New Collegiate dictionary
18. I tried to read Ency Brittanica but had to quit in the “E’s”
19. I have had over 1,000 students in grades 3-12 (as a teacher, not counting the ones in my schools as a headmaster)
20. I watch way too many movies
21. My wife has worked at three Cracker Barrels in three different states.  47 more to go.
22. I once threw a shoe into the Mississippi River
23. I hit a monkey with a snowball and he spit at me.
24. I have a wine glass from the White House in my house.
25. I have been in four states at the same time.

Now don’t ever ask me to do this again.  What a waste of good time!

This looks to be the year where I get manipulated by my own failing body into becoming serious about its care. I don’t wanna do this, but things look necessary.
A. About five years ago I got shocked into a daily walking routine by the doctor’s showing me that I have out of control cholesterol levels and blood pressure. So I went on meds, started walking, and allowed the hideous encounter with South Beach to occur.
B. I moved to NC about 3 years ago and moved into a house that really precludes walking (high traffic, high speed road is all I got).
C. About a month ago, my doc informs me I have way over the top blood sugars – I have adult onset diabetes. Gotta do what I don’t wanna do.
D. So for now, its joining a gym in the next week, trying to track my progress on this http://www.gyminee.com thing, and starting to watch the carbs.

Its payment time for all those years of not caring about such, and its going to kill a cook-o-phile like myself. Every good thing comes with its own punishment.

I am just beside myself with this coming election.  Baskin Robbins gives me all these choices, but the electoral process can only give me two, and I don’t like either of them! I don’t know what to do.  I thought I would share the following analysis of last night’s “debate” or town-hall bleeding:

I listened to the debate last night on the radio. I haven’t watched any video yet, but I can guess. Here’s what I heard:

Obama: The government is going to take over every part of your life, and you need to be happy that someone finally is.

McCain: My friends, Reagan, across the table, my track record, my friends, my hero is Ronald Reagan, my hero is Teddy Roosevelt, my friends, I have friends who are democrats, across the aisle, my friends.

Obama: I’m going to take rich people’s money and give it to people who already don’t pay taxes.

McCain: My friends, blah blah blah, bipartisan blah blah blah.

Obama: I don’t need to say anything else of substance because Senator McCain is sucking all of the oxygen out of the room.

McCain: My friends, my track record, economy?, I’ll buy your bad mortgages, Social Security, we all know what we need my friends, my track record for talking to democrats, blah blah blah.

Obama: Am I allowed to paint the Oval Office any color I want?

McCain: I need a nap.

::thud::

My prediction: Unless someone has pictures of Obama with Osama in which they’re both dressed like Shirley Temple and kicking puppies and smoking crack, Obama is the next president.

All right, so maybe I am not quite so cynical, but I am really close.  My young sons were astute enough to know that nothing was being asserted with any authority, that most of the “questions” were not answered, and not worth answering.  Anybody have a hand basket?